Squeezin’ blood from a stone

Pee here or starve.

Pee here or starve.

OK, this is just too much to bear. If I was in Raleigh, I would spit on these mean-spirited, wicked men.

Oh, sorry. Zelda here. Nell is so mad, she went out to chop wood lest she harm somethin’ in the house.

Those nasty polecats are lookin’ to make poor folk take a drug test and pay for it — even though there is no reason to believe they are doin’ drugs. I think that might be a violation of my Constitutional rights to unlawful search and seizure.

You know Florida tried this very same thing and spent millions of dollars on administration of the damn thing and found about two people what had drugs in their pee.

I think it’s much more likely them asshats in Raleigh are the ones doin’ drugs. We should test them.

Now, here’s the deal. Let’s say I am a woman with two young ‘uns and my husband leaves or dies and I am left to raise them on my own. I have no trainin’, and I can’t find a job for somebody who has no skills. So I apply for government assistance and I am told I can have less than $300 a week and I have to volunteer or train for a job for 30 hours a week just to get that.

Now, that money ain’t even gonna pay for care for the kids, let alone food and shelter. And now those jackasses want to make a woman pay for a drug test — as though she could afford any kind a drug on that money.

I was talkin’ to a man from Philadelphia the other day as he was buyin’ some boiled peanuts at the store an’ I felt obligated to tell him we ain’t all like that bunch in Raleigh. Most of us would rather help people who are down on their luck, I told him.

He didn’t even hafta ask; all he did was say good mornin’, but now I feel compelled to tell people who visit our fair state that we all ain’t like those wicked creatures in Raleigh.

I’ve a mind to get in the truck and drive out there to give ’em a piece of my mind. An’ I know a young widow who needs help and don’t use drugs I can take with me.

Problem is, I just don’t think I can resist spittin’ on ’em and then Nell would have to come up with bail money. She was right unhappy last time that happened.

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